My husband, a peds subspecialist, has numerous urges and possibilities for career advancement. All would require a geographic move. I feel that I am in
an ideal situation for mix of life and work, one that has
evolved gradually over the years since our son was
born(he's six). I'm a psychiatrist in part time, outpatient,
practice and share my office space with wonderful,
nonphysician, female colleagues. I'm very much the
mom/homemaker in our family, and know I can't or don't want to work more doctor hours........How can I weigh this out? Are there lots of mommds out there who have
a great balance? Anyone with experience in managing
the 2 physician marriage challenges? OF COURSE there are gender and social issues....He works longer
doctor hours and makes more money, like most female physicians I spend more
time with my patients, he doesn't want to retire or go
part-time and be househusband...........
Looking forward to many answers that will make this
dilemma go away....

Hi. It sounds like we have similar practices -- I'm in solo practice working 4 days a week 9-3 with a 6 year old son and an 18-month old daughter. My husband is an academic neurologist. As long as he gets tenure (we should know in the next 2-3 years) we'll stay, but if he doesn't, we'll be in the same boat you are.

My sense about psychiatry and particularly outpatient private practice is that it should be very portable. Do you think you wouldn't be able to set up a similar practice in a new place? I actually saw this as precisely the reason to do private practice since my husband is in a totally subspecialized field and if we move it would be only be to one of a few of the large academic medical centers. I figure if we have to move, I can do this anywhere. The patients are certainly there. It would just be the startup time to make new referral connections and figure out the local resources, and I assume you could network in advance to help with that, or go introduce yourself to the local academic center and work in a clinic part time to get started locally and make some guaranteed income while your private practice is starting. At least around here, women psychiatrists in private practice who do both therapy and meds are in EXTREMELY high demand and we're always full.

Are there some other reasons, though, why you don't want to move?

PS, I vote for keeping your current schedule. I love being able to do drop off and pick up from school, and having a day off lets me have catch up time for me and time for friends. Good luck!

Robbie,
I am also in a similar situation. I am a psychiatrist working part-time with two sons ages 5 and 2 and husband general pediatrician working full time in a large group setting. I agree with psych I do believe that female psychiatrists are in high demand just about anywhere you go. Certainly, some areas may be more saturated than others, but in general the demand is there. I believe that I made a conscious decision to practice psychiatry specifically because it is flexible enough to accomodate my family. So far this has been the case. The issue may be whether you want to relocate the whole family at this particular time. Just a thought.

I am also in a dual physician marriage. We married when I was an intern and he was a 3-rd year resident. What we have done over the last 17 years of marriage is "take turns." The first move was for him to pay back the Navy for putting him through 3 of the 4 years of medical school (that was grueling!). Then it was my turn to complete my residency. Then it was his turn to pursue his fellowship (but I guided him as to which one would be best ... closer to his aging parents at that time). Then it was my turn since I had a highly specialized specialty and his was alittle more versatile (plus he always had internal medicine to fall back on).

Unfortuneatly, the next move looks like it will be my husband's choice. Luckily, neither of us wants to move. We are both sick of moving. We've been here 7 years (and still don't have all the boxes in the garage yet unpacked). I quit full-time to go part-time 3 years ago, only to be laid-off effective this coming Spring! He's in solo private practice and reimbursement stinks. To tell you the truth, I don't know how we are going to pay the bills this summer. I have some local locums lined up for awhile...but later on, I'll have to search for more locums. Luckily my youngest will start school this next academic year, and there is a great childcare in town with long hours (in case I'm out-of-town). I refuse to move out-of-state. One of my children will graduate from high school in a couple of years ... it would be too difficult to move.

It's a tough position to be in. I sympathize. Good luck.

I am a writer for Physicians Practice, the Business Journal for Physicians, and I am writing an article about the challenges of the "medical marriage" and the "medical family," especially marriages between two physicians. Anyone interested in being interviewed on the topic and getting their two cents in about how they, as female physicians, find "balance" between work and family/marriage? I would welcome comments from all kinds of physicians - single parents, married to other physicians, married to non-physicians, etc.

You can contact me at cgainer@physicianspractice.com or call me at 1-800-781-2211 ext. 140

Thanks!

Cassie
Associate Editor, special projects
Physicians Practice