Hi everybody.

I'm a freshman in college at the moment. I have wanted to be a doctor for as long as I can remember and I'm doing well in my first round of pre-reqs. I guess I'm just having an identity crisis at the moment. I'm not sure if I want to give up 12 years of my life to a job. To studying. To keep trying to move onto the next step instead of enjoying life in the moment. I want to do other things than be a doctor.

I've been looking into Graduate-Entry Nursing Programs where I can become a NP in three years after college. More flexibility, more options, still in the healthcare field, and an better chance at having a life and a family. It's hard for me as a woman, and that's why I'm here.

My question to those who are currently doctors and have been through the process like me (high school-college-med school-residency with no breaks), would you do it again? Do you have a life now?

I want to help people, and I'm not afraid of the work it takes to become a doctor, I'm just scared that I'm going to throw myself into this and realize when I'm thirty that I'm not happy. That's a long time not to be happy.

Thanks girls!

Honestly I am glad that I didn't go straight through. True, when you are 18 and just starting, that 12 year stretch truly looks like a nightmare. Step back and take a breath. Life generally doesn't go how you planned it and medical school will always be there. You take it one step at a time. Worry about getting through college first, re-evaluate, Maybe you will find a husband, a new desire for a different career, or want to start a family. I had a 7 year gap between graduating college and going to med school, had 2 kids in the gap. You get overwhelmed if you think about the effort to get to this point (I graduate residency in 4 months at age 40). That's really old when you are 18!!! but I feel great. I'm happy I did it this way. You take the journey in steps. Enjoy your life while you are young, travel, wait until you are a junior before worrying whether or not the med school road is right at that time.

If I did not take the steps I took in my life, my life would have been a disaster. So, no regrets here.

I am a nontrad. student as well, and I wouldn't give it up for anything. I have had a great first career in social work and the experiences of working with people from all different backgrounds will serve me well as I move forward.

I had my life planned out at 18... the plan was premed, med school, residency, meet person of dreams, get married (~30ish), have children.

Reality: premed became SW, met DH @ 20, married at 22, children at 24/26/28, starting med school at 31.

Ahhh... the best laid plans...

I'm a non traditional student - BA in Business in 96, married 96, kids 99, 01, 06, and I'm finishing up my premed prereqs now for enrolling jan 2010 (I'll turn 39 in Feb). I knew what I wanted at 18 and fortunately, most came to pass WITH TIME - but not on my time schedule. And I certainly had no idea medicine would be in my future!!

My advice: Enjoy being at the stage you are at. Have a GENERAL idea of what you want and work towards that, but be flexible enough to change direction 180 degrees in the middle of it all!! If you have you mind made up that A leads to B to C and that you will end up with D - you are setting yourself up for possible disappointment. If it happens - great. If it doesn't and the path is C, B, D, and onto F, you'll feel so many negative emotions and add stress to your life.

Just ride the wave of life, but have your surfboard pointed where you think you want to go, and be prepared to fall off and get back on!!

I am glad I found this thread. I have been trying to find the perfect time to apply to med school for years now. I wanted to apply 2 years ago then my husband was accepted to Veterinarian school. He finishes in 2 years and I was thinking about applying then but I just do not think I can put my kids (ages 5 & 6) through anymore of this. My husband is gone so much and they miss him dearly. I too am so ready for it to be over with because I miss him too. We see him everyday for about 1-2 hours in the evening, he eats dinner, plays with the kids, and then he is off to study. He never makes it home before midnight and I am asleep when he returns. He is the first one up and the last one to bed each night. My son told his teacher he never wants to take tests because they are scary. I think he thinks this since during test weeks the stress is very high in our household. My husband takes the kids to play at the park on Saturday adn we all go out to eat but I do not see him much on the weekend either. I attend church alone on Sundays with the kids and that makes me sad. My husband told me if I put him thorugh school he would return the favor but here lately he says I am crazy if I ever attempt med school because he is so stressed and he doesn't wish it upon anyone. (I should mention our closest relative is 120 miles away.)

It hurts to put my dreams on hold but I feel like I have to do this. I am currently 27 years old and I will be 39 when my kids finish school. That may be the perect time for me to apply. I have started to accept this better but it took me over a year to accept it without crying. I feel like I put everyone else before me and then when I think about applying to med school and balancing it all, I feel very guilty. My husband is on propecia because he is going bald due to stress. At first his doctor told him it was male pattern balding but then his hair grew back over the Christmas holidays so his doctor said it must be the stress causing him to lose so much hair. (they did blood work and it was fine.) My husbands on anti-anxiety meds I need to be on them since I teach high school science all day and then come home to more stress. I want my kids to experience a more normal life because we have been students since they were born but it hurts to put my dreams on hold although I hope it will be worth it in the end. Thanks for listening!

NO, i would have never gone into medicine if i knew better at 18. i'm 32 now, happily married with 2 kids and work very part time as a primary care doc---totally underpaid, under appreciated and deep in med school debt that will take 20 years to get out of completely. i found the private practice world eats you alive and the academic world is so stressful. lots of my physician girlfrends are either unmarried, infertile, divorced or have decided to stay-at-home with their kids in the end because the medical world is not family friendly. i think there are tons of other careers out there that are VERY fulfilling but doesn't suck the life out of human beings. i just didn't give myself a chance to explore because i went straight through premed, med school, residency. the only good thing that came out of the process was meeting my husband in med school.
maybe specialists feel differently but my primary care friends are not happy.

I would encourage anyone right now, the way medicine is today, to avoid becoming a physician unless it is the ONLY role you see yourself in. The general atmosphere in medicine now with Obamanomics in place is NOT good. Unless you go into one of the uber competitive specialties (and this is NOT available to anyone) the medical field is becoming less and less appealing.

I have been considering medical school since I was an undergrad and through my masters (6 years+ now), and I've just applied to PA school. For me, PA training just seems like so much less of a sacrifice to my life and I think the intrinsic job satisfaction (working closely with patients, helping them get better) is not really that different from a doctor. I would probably feel differently if I knew that I wanted to work full-time, was not worried about missing those years in my late twenties/thirties with kids, and a great salary was a top priority to me (although PA salaries are not bad).
I'm feeling more and more confident that I'll be very happy being a PA, although sometimes it does bother me that I'm effectively losing the over-achiever label I've had my whole life. I'm trying to work on detaching my self-esteem from my academic qualifications, although it's difficult since it's something I've done my whole life. Not sure if any of that resonates with you, but I always find it's nice to know that other people have been in similar situations!
On another thought, have you considered PA school over being a nurse practitioner? While the jobs can be more or less similar, I like that as a PA I will be trained in the medical model, and be able to switch between medical specialties (and as you're not a nurse already, this might be something worth thinking about).

hey, this i a great topic! I am finishing up my undergrad and applying to medical school right now. I think this is something that every women feels very strongly about because i'm sure every member here has thought about it so much! Although I don't know the outcomes yet of the whole process - I am very glad that I am doing this! It is the only thing I can see myself doing and I know that in the end it will be worth it! Time FLYS by and you will be done before you know it. Yes, it is going to take a lot of work to get there but if it is what you really want to do then you will enjoy it! If there is anything I have gotten out of finding this group is that anything is possible if you want it to be! I haven't taken a break yet from school and my plan is not to....but if I feel like it - it is always an option. I got married during my undergrad....planning a wedding while taking ochem and everything was fine. You will know what is right for you and only you will know!

I was just talking to one of my best friends who is also applying to med school with me and we were talking about how it is a good thing to think about all of this. Personally I always go away feeling better than I did before because I KNOW this is what I want to do! I am very scared about the government getting involved with health care and messing things up more but hopefully I can play a role in making the changes that are going to need to be made in order for health care to survive.

It is a long road.... only you will know if it is right for you! You still have a few years to figure out what you really want to do as well, maybe another area of health care would be a better fit....the only bad part is that nursing is very different from premed...but there is always PA programs which from what I understand are just as tough to get into as medical school the only plus is that it would be some time shorter.

Enjoy life along the way....I always set up study times where I study for a day or a few days almost every waking moment to have the weekend off to spend with family and friends. You will find a way to do it.... don't stress too much!