sorry 2 borther you ladies, but this is one of the best sites i know.

I am currently 18wks preg and seeing a midwife, the problem is that I am not so sure she is the right one for me. It doesn't really have anything to do with midwife, but I was really sick with a bad sinus infection and fever and had to call her on call. she was very short with me. I sounded terrible and she seemed clueless as to what was wrong with me. I wanted to know if I should go somewhere- fever was only 100.7, but this is my first and I was a little freaked. she just said I can do whatever I want and if the doc I see wants to do an antibio them that is fine.

It wasn't even late at night when I called and I know that she has a ton of patients but shouldn't see at least be nice to me??

so we are thinking of switching to an OB who our friends highly recomend. I just feel bad switching.

any thoughts??

Thanks

My OB has 24 hr. call support. I haven't had a need to call them so far but they told me they always have nurse on call.

I've never been pregnant, but I have seen several doctors who I didn't care for, and seeing as pregnancy (especially the first) is very new, stressful, and there are a lot of unknowns, I would probably switch to someone I felt more comfortable with. Especially since you're still fairly early in the pregnancy, you'll still have plenty more OB appts before you deliver, and this is supposed to be a wonderful and happy time--go with your gut and find someone you trust. I wouldn't worry about offending the midwife, especially if the new OB is part of a different pactice.

Of course she she should be courteous and NOT "short" with you! Go ahead and switch! Sometimes, I'll give someone a bit of "slack" in that I may have gotten them on an "off day" but if, for other reasons, you have someone else in mind for care, then change! I mostly responded here because it strikes me as interesting as to how yes, mostly women, worry about "feeling bad" that they want to switch MDs/nurse midwives. Don't even give a thought to it!

Go with the provider that you feel is best for you. You need to feel like the person taking care of you and the baby is actually taking CARE, not just going through the motions, and most people understand first pregnancy jitters as long as their patients are relatively reasonable. My husband and I are running into this right now - we like our OB practice, but we're having monoamniotic twins and we think it might be better to go to a perinatologist since it is a high risk condition.

I'd switch. I'd agonize, I'd procrastinate, but eventually I'd switch. Does this other person take people mid-pregnancy? I'd certainly ask ASAP, because some practices have cutoffs.

And - not to derail - Niskayuna23, wouldn't you get your high risk stuff done with the peri and then the OB would do the normal stuff? That's how it was for us with TTTS: the perinatologist did the amniotic fluid reduction and did extensive monitoring, and then the OB did the delivery. It was good - the OB was, just a couple years prior, a resident supervised by this perinatologist and so the two had a great professional relationship. (And now there's some reasonable chance he'll teach me during my OB rotations 3rd year. Eek.) By the way, you'll be in my thoughts - have you been put on bedrest?

No bedrest, but they'll be wanting me inpatient as soon as my husband and I would feel comfortable delivering (probably 27-28 wks) so they can monitor for cord compressions, and they won't want to let me go past 34 weeks if no cord problems have popped up. I don't know about the OB/perinatology cooperative - the OB I went to said they wouldn't send me to one, but I really feel like I'd like that extra opinion, and I don't feel confident that my regular OB is up on all the monitoring that we'd be doing. My next appointment is with a different person in the practice, so I may get different data about seeing the peri. I'm starting my OB clerkship next week so I'll probably be able to ask one of my attendings what is normal for this scenario, and hopefully find out a little bit on the peri's in my area so I don't end up seeing a troll! I just got nervous because one or two of the things my OB said don't seem accurate with all the papers I've read since finding out the twins were monoamniotic. So combine that with being just a super paranoid med student and knowing that there are real things to worry about.... I've been driving my husband a little nuts.

She shouldn't have been short. But you also have to remember you have chosen to see a *nurse* with additional training in OB-- she is not a doctor, and it is very possible she actually *didn't* know what was wrong with you, since it didn't directly involve the pregnancy. If you had called with an OB problem she felt more confident with, maybe she would not have been so abrupt? If she is always like that I would switch-- you should probably weigh against all the other experiences you have had with her, and remember that pregnant women tend to be pretty emotional.

thank you all so much. we decided to switch, well I think. I have called around, asked for recommendations, and reviewed the other hospitals and finally I have an appt with someone I hope to be happy with. she is an OB and delivers at my orginal hospital of choice. I think an OB feels a little better. I was going for natural, but with research I have found you can find OBs that support that method also.

I am happy for the moment, hopefully when I meet her our personalities mesh well.

thanks

Well, maybe it's just me, but I can understand her... A sinus infection is not something that can't wait until the next morning. My OB has a 24-hour on-call nurse, but that's only for emergencies/labor/bleeding/water broke/etc. There is a nurse that calls you back within a few hours if you call in the day.

She still shouldn't have been short with you; obviously if you called you were worried enough. But say she is with a woman in labor, another one is having preterm contractions, and you call for a relatively minor thing... maybe she just was overwhelmed at that particular time.

I personally wouldn't change for that reason alone, but if you are uncomfortable with her for any reason, changing provider is not a problem at all! I hope you are happier with your next provider.