...oops, I clicked the 'add reply' button before I was finished :twocents:

Shauna

Points taken! I just sometimes feel like Im sending the message, "If you do what I dont like, I will physically hurt you". That doesnt make me feel good. But if those type punishments will save him his life, and make him a better person than not...I guess it would be better to spank.
Mya....I love your post! I got my *a double snakes* kicked too, I turned out okay...although, unlike you, I did get into fights with people. My older sister got her butt kicked more than me, did her no good to this day. She knows how to box though!

Shauna... you broke it down for us didnt you! :yes: Check your mail.

BTW, you guys must have some great kids, or mine, one in particular, is/are hethrens!

This is a tough one...

Like Kris, I was raised in a household where physical violence was the norm. My brother and I would be forced to strip to skin in(in front of each other)and endure the belt for the *slightest* infractions. Not only was it a physically painful experience, but very humiliating as well.

I am going to do my darnedest to never strike my child. I know that I have the potential to lose control - I don't EVER want that to happen. :guilty:

That being said, I am not opposed to a swat on the butt...I just don't think it is an option for me.

I think Mya hit the nail on the head (in fact I'm starting to think we may be twins separated at birth seeing how many things we have absolutely agreed on! ) by saying that society is completely out of control.

I was not spanked often as a child. In fact I only remember a handful of times, but each time I was spanked I fully deserved it. (Isn't 20/20 hindsight a great thing!?!) I knew it was a possibility and I knew that there were rules that I had to follow. Period. I was going to obey my curfew, let my parents know where I was going to be and who was going to be supervising, I was going to be holding down a part time job when I turned 16 and babysitting for "recreation money" earlier than that, I was going to respect my parents, teachers and elders and all of these things were non-negotiable. My parents weren't really overly strict...they did not interfere with the friends or boyfriends I chose, they let me go out, they didn't need to know everything about my life, but if I didn't follow the rules there were consequences.

We have taken all authority away from parents, teachers, and a whole host of other should be "authority figures". Society is WAY out of control. Teachers can not say or do anything that could even remotely be perceived as being threatening for fear of lawsuits. (I'm not advocating any kind of corporal punishment here, just a simple healthy respect) I remember my mom saying to my and my brother's teachers, you have my full authority to discipline my children and I will support you on it. Parents these days expect teachers and the school system to teach their children discipline but don't give them any authority to do so. It really should start in the home!

No is not a four letter word and as hard as it may be for a parent (and now that I have my own, I am as guilty as anyone, sometimes I just don't want to deal with the tantrum that will ensue when you say no...so I take the easy road :boggled: ) it just needs to be said. How can a child respect you as a parent when they do not see you as a parent, but a friend, with all of the "negotiating priveledges that come with this label. I'm not advocating that parents not be "friends" with their kids, as long as they are "parents" first.

There is no better gift you can give you can give your kids than discipline. What gift will help them out in the "real world" as much as this one?