I am still convinced (and happy as a clam)that medical school is working out well. God has had a hand in everything that I have endured. I am blessed...I truly believe that all of the hardships I experienced over the last year and a half will form me in more ways than I will ever know.

I am done with Cardiopulm! :twocents:

PS~I am doing better than I ever thought I would, obstacles included. To anyone thinking about medicine, or going through it, God will help you fulfill His plans for you. Don't worry!!!!!! :goodvibes:

Wow...over a year since my last post...obviously I am not the journalling type. I would like to share some things with all of you since last posting.

First of all...I have mistakenly spent time on another "student doctor" site (please read into that) and want to say how refreshing it is to come back to this site and its positivity. I have yet to find a thread there that is not full of whiny, angry students complaining about how they have been wronged by the AMA, the AOA or some other entity. Here the support is tangible. THANK YOU!!!

Well, since last year, I have become a second year medical student and I am one section away from becoming a third year. First semester this year had me in two grueling sections of Neuro (my school teaches in a systems approach) and Skin/blood/lymph. I am finishing up endocrine, hopefully on a strong note.

I had some time in first semester where I thought I was actually going crazy...losing my mind. The difficulty of subject matter had just sky rocketed for me. I wanted to blame it on ADD, hypothyroidism, something that could be fixed. Then I realized that it was second year burn-out, just early, since I had come straight from the Masters program at the med school. I am still having a very hard time focusing and getting through studying, but I am pulling through.

This year has gone by so much faster than first year and I am so excited to start clinical rotations. I have great news that I matched to my hometown. There was a real possibility of either having to make a huge commute (weekly) or move away for a month at a time. That seemed incomprehensible to me. Thank God that I was able to stay near home. I am worried that I will get shorted on my academic instruction, though, because we are farmed out on a preceptor basis, with no real academic structure. Any suggestions?

It's nice to be back

Well, this month started off like a lamb (coated in 6 inches of snow) and went out like a lion. But the same can be said for my school. My school had an upheaval of administration at winter break, ousting our old President and seating the Chairman of the Board to the temporary position of Pres. There was a lull, then at the beginning of March, almost daily lawsuits were filed, all about money. We have all been reassured that our school is solvent and everything will be fine, but I am just on edge. There are all kinds of things going on that are making me very mistrustful. Rumor is going around that the school can only graduate 250. We started with over 270. That means that they expect that many to fail or drop out or defer. This month, I have had one friend falsely accused and coerced into settling for something that wasn't right in order to avoid an ethics violation accusation; another was kicked out with 4 weeks of class to go. I look back over the last year, and several of my friends have had serious things happen in their lives, many of which have either failed out of school or had to postpone their education. I am thankful that I have been able to overcome my obstacles so far.

I am also in a funk...I just don't feel at ease, and I think that on top of all the weird stuff going on at school, two weeks ago, a man I used to work with was murdered. It was his last night working at the convenience store, and it was robbed. He gave them everything, but they shot him anyway. It wasn't a person that I had even seen in a couple of years, but when I worked with him, I had really felt that we were friends. He was a happy, kind, respectful guy that would do anything to help. He worked as a transporter for the rad dept, but was the best at his job. He treated all of the patients with dignity and kindness. He was always ready with a big smile. He was beautiful inside and out. He loved his kids with all his heart and everything he did was for them. Like I said, I haven't seen him in a while, but I am broken hearted that this happened.

I will get through this. I don't have to like it though.