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#70743 - 04/11/06 05:48 PM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
I really do not have much to share at the moment. Just some small thoughts from my brain. My first year of medical school, I know will be very interesting. One of my soon to be graduating seniors will be attending the graduate school portion of the school. The school is not that big and the first year graduate classes take some of the basic science courses. So I will be with this student again. The biggest twist is that her sister and I are best friends (I am the the godmother of her son). I have known the student since she was a teenager. I see a lot of potential in her, but her MCAT is what hurt her and finances. She knew that she could not apply to a wide range of schools because of money. :wave:

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#70744 - 04/18/06 06:01 PM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
Well another week has gone by. One less week until I get to leave my job and go to medical school. I am not sure If I will make it to June. The only reason for me staying would be the money and I am not a person who likes to work for money.But hey I am the only one paying the bills. I did decide to get a part time job in May to help with my finances though. I need to pay off some credit cards and other bills before I go to school. I guess when you go to medical school when you are older, debt is already a factor. If you can prevent it, do so.
Right now I am in the process of trying to help one of my students gather materials to study for the MCAT. The courses available cost an arm and a leg. She is very diligent student and I think she can study on her own and receive a high score. The MCAT can drain you physically and mentally. :wave:

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#70745 - 04/25/06 08:00 PM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
I wrote this post early today, but it got erased. I probably won't remember everything I wrote. The biggest thing, this past weekend DH and I visited some of his family and told of our pending situation. They reallydid not have much to say. His daughter onthe other hand told me that I could not leave them. That broke my heart :wave:

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#70746 - 05/01/06 07:39 AM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
Well from today just eight more weeks until I leave my job. :hyper: I should not be that happy but I am. I am hoping the days go by very quickly.
This past weekend I went to new student day. It was ok. I felt a little out of place. Of course the whole class was not there but for those who came, there was not a lot of minorities, which prompts me to want to really write a book. And I still have the vision to open a school. Also this weekend I went hunting for somewhere to live. I am still confused on what we tell people what our new income will be. confused I can get an apartment based on my current income but, the after I am still not sure about.
My next biggest project is to lose 30 pounds before school starts. I started today by walking 2 miles and hopefully if I am not too tired to walk again this evening. I hope everyone has a great week and that everyone accomplish what they want to.

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#70747 - 05/05/06 08:22 PM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
Dilema after dilema seems to come up when you do not want them to. Or they could just be blessings in disguise. AFter 5 years DH and I are throwing in the towel. It is not something I want and I do want to fight for it, but I am getting tired of fighting a losing battle. The biggest twist is 5 weeks pregnant. Long time ago we talked about having kids. For me personally I could get by with or without having children. For him he did not want to start all over again with diapers, etc... I have not told him yet. This has happened to us twice before and both ended in miscarriage. Sometimes you just slip up. :wave:

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#70748 - 05/15/06 09:33 AM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
One less week until I leave work. Yesterday was mother's day and it was pretty good. I still have not told DH about the baby. I am just scared of what he will say. :wave:

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#70749 - 05/22/06 08:37 AM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
Aprroximately 6 more weeks until the job is over. Last week I decide to play hookey from work. Once I leave my job they said they will not pay for our sick time accumulated so I am going to try to use some this summer so I do not have to be there at times.
I am a little worried about money. I still have not found a part time job. Maybe it is not ment for me to have one. I should probably relax. Come to think of it, during that time I will have to move, so maybe I should not start one, but where is the money going to come from.....

Well I finally got told DH about the pregnancy on Saturday. It ws not the way I wanted to tell him. I was really moody Saturday night and I did not want to be bothered by anyone. Lo and Behold he decides to call, he did not really want anything that I can remember but he kept asking me "Are you ok" I would just tell him I am in a mood. he kept asking and asking what up and I finally blurted out I am pregnant. He sat in silence for a very long time and still has not called or said anything about it. I am not sure how to take it. :wave:
Subject: Fw: Bedtime
G'nite, Mom....

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed." She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next dayís lunches, rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat
out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning. She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button. She picked up the game pieces left on the table, put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer. She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry. She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a text book out from hiding under the chair. She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse. Mom then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night solution & age fighting moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails. Dad called out, "I thought you were going to bed." "I'm on my
way," she said. She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked and the patio light was on. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside lamps and TV's, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack.
She added three things to her 6 most important things to do list. She said her prayers, and visualized the accomplishment of her goals. About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular. "I'm going to bed." And he did...without another thought.
Anything extraordinary here? Wonder why women live longer... BECAUSE THEY ARE MADE FOR THE LONG HAUL THATíS Why !!..... (They canít die sooner; they still have things to do)
_________________________________________________
Life is what you make of it. Let no one take over your dreams :cloud9:

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#70750 - 05/22/06 08:13 PM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
I know I wrote something earlier today, but I have just watched such a moving experience. The Legends Ball that Oprah had was just breath taking. I was just sitting there crying my eyes out. To thank all of those wonderful women, many of whom I also idolize. Cicley Tyson, Dr. Maya Angelou, Pattie Label, Coretta Scott King, the list just goes on and on. The expereince could be felt through the television. Her actions make me want to do the same for the many women in my life that have made a difference. I can not do it on Oprah's scale but something should be done while they are alive. I am crying now just thinking of it. :weeping: I can start by saying I am greatful for this website to share my thoughts and ideas with other women who are striving for the same goals. Who are going through some of the same things that I am. Women who are strong despite their situations, women who are able to uplift even when they feel down, women who want to better others.... :grouphug:
Take the time to thank someone today. Do not wait for a special day. Send a candle, flowers, a card, take them out to dinner, show appreciation before it is too late. :grouphug:

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#70751 - 06/05/06 07:39 AM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
A lot has happened since I was last here. DH was willing to keep the baby, which was good. He even went to the first doctor's appointment with me(I think it was just to make sure). The appointment was not a good one. The doctor told me the pregnancy will not be viable. She said I could either abort medically, or let it happene naturally, well by memorial day there was no more baby :no: :ouch: My body decided to miscarry. I have been home for the past two weeks trying to get my head around things and it is hard. This is my third time and I am not sure what to think. On one hand it was for good on the other it still hurts. I really try not to think about it too much because it makes me cry. Any way

I received my mortgage papers in the mail all I have to do is sign them. The payments are kind of high for the full amount of the loan, hopefully I can find something for less to lower my payments. I am still waiting on my financial aid package. I still need a place to live by the 1st of July, which is right around the corner. I am so nervous that I am going to be rushed into buying something I do not want.

You never know what is going to happen from day to day. When you go to bed at night, you anticipate the next day, for some that day never comes. When you wake in the morning, it is a fresh new start, yesterday is gone and tomorrow is in the distant future. You can only live for what you have today. Do not take it for granted. :grouphug:

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#70752 - 06/12/06 08:34 AM Re: My Heart's Desire
doctorjoy Offline
Member

Registered: 04/21/05
Posts: 180
Loc: Where God wants me to be
The countdown continues.... 14 more days until I leave my job; 2 months before medical school starts. ?To combat being bored at work and staying until 5 I am come in as early as possible to leave as early as possible.
Well Physically my body is doing ok. I went to the doctor for a check up and everything looks ok. She wants to do some testing to see why I continue to miscarry. I am really not pressed to do it because I am not sure how long it will be before I am with someone again and hopefully it is when I am married for good. :wave: :yes: :rotfl:

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