I agree with everyone else, and I'm glad you are letting her go. I would make sure to get any keys from her that night and make sure to change any passwords she has knowledge of to make sure she has no access to anything.

I hope you have a smooth transition. Hopefully your husband will find a job very soon and you find someone who actually helps you all with the kids. It sounds like you are working extremely hard and things are stressful. Hang in there, Mom!

Thinking of you today and hopsing things go well with your transition. You are doing the right thing-hang in there!!

Thanks again, for everyone's wishes.

We ended up telling her on Thursday, and that was her last day. We paid her for an additional 2 weeks. She put up some resistance, claiming that we owed her a bonus and pay for vacation. However, we had already given her more time off than the pre-specified number of vacation days, and I never promised her a bonus. In addition, she claimed that I needed to give her 2 weeks notice, allow her to work, and pay her 1 month of pay beyond this.

Today (Saturday), she called my cell phone over 10 times and left 2 messages. 1 message was that she left sweater at the house. My husband called her back that we would mail her the sweater. The other message was that she needed a letter stating the dates that she worked for us and a list of her duties. I haven't provided this sort of letter before, and I am a little hesitant to write this letter because I am concerned that it may be used for other purposes than as reference for her future employer. I thought that usually, references were made by telephone. When she applied with us, she listed 2 previous nanny jobs on her application, and did not provide us with letters.

I must add, when she interviewed with us, she did provide phone numbers for her previous jobs, and her previous employers both told me she performed her job well, but they had to let her go because they did not need a nanny anymore. There did not seem to be any red flags.

Honestly, her calling me over 10 times today is freaking me out.

I bet she's trying to get unemployment. And next time you or your husband call her, I would mention a restraining order if this behavior does not cease. Let her know she can contact you by mail or email or some other nonthreatening way only. This woman sounds like a head case, glad you got her out of there!

Oh, and keep the calls in your phone memory, so if you DO need a restraining order, you have evidence.

You are under no obligation to provide her a letter. She is just looking to avoid having to put down your phone number as a reference and wants something that shows that she has been working during this time to avoid a gap in her work history. Just tell her that you will confirm her dates of employment and duties for anyone who might call for a reference and leave it at that. That being said, if anyone does call, you are only obligated to confirm her dates of employment. If you do only that and refuse to say anything else about her, the prospective employer will get the message loud and clear.

Good riddance!!!

This lady keeps calling me. It has been over 15 times this weekend. She was irritated that I didn't return her call yesterday. I called her back nicely this morning that we were sending her the sweater and I will write a letter stating she worked for us as a live-in nanny from x date to x date.

So my question is, is it unwritten custom to give your nanny a bonus equivelent to 1 month of salary after 1 year of work? I did not agree to this but this lady keeps calling me to tell me I am a jerk for not giving her notice and owe her more money.

Then she called back an hour later and demanded a bonus equivalent to 1 month's salary, telling me that when we met for the first time, that she told me that she requires a bonus after 1 year and I agreed by nodding. She also acused me of being a cheapskate, and how dare I fire her just to avoid paying her the 1 year bonus. You all know that is not the case at all.

I would write a letter listing the dates AND the reasons you fired her. HA. No, there is no customary one month bonus. There is a customary 2 weeks severance, and you have already agreed to that. Anything that is not in writing does not exist, period. She sounds like she is seriously off her rocker. Did you change your locks? Take her off the daycare consents? Etc? I would also follow through with telling her you're going to file a police complaint if she doesn't back off.