So we have been free from our nanny for the past 2 weeks. Things are going well. My husband is enjoying making dinner for us and since he has the day free while the kids are in daycare, he has time for recreation and relaxation.

I have received 3 phone calls to ask for reference for our former nanny, all of the jobs involve her being at home with 1 or 2 children while the professional parents are at work. My husband is an attorney, and he advised me that I should just confirm her dates of employment and her duties. One phone call was from another physician in my large multi-specialty group. The next day, that physician sent me an email at work, asking why I kept sending my kids to daycare if I had a nanny and asking about why she left. Apparently, the nanny had told her that she had worked for us for 2 years, and after us, she had worked with a family taking care of a newborn and a 2 year-old. When I told her that the nanny had only worked with us for 1 year and that her last day with us was last week, she was appalled.

BTW, our former nanny left me a voicemail this weekend expressing her concern, asking if we were able to manage, and telling me that she has other job opportunities but wanted to give us the opportunity to hire her back at her previous salary (no raise).

Don't respond to the voicemail. Glad things are going well.

Thanks for the great update!

This story is both scary and hilarious, depending on your viewpoint! A friend of mine was a nanny during undergraduate years--he is a fluent French speaker so he was paid a very good wage to look after 2 kids and speak to them only in French--the parents told their kids that he didn't speak any English, so they would have to speak to him in French. This situation worked out wonderfully as far as I could see for both parties for 2 years (but granted, he was only available in the afternoons since he was also a full-time student.) Also, I used to take care of a baby for about 8 hrs/week during undergrad years and loved it--I really enjoyed playing with a baby during breaks from lectures and studying. Not that I have ANY experience with hiring nannies, but I wonder if seeking out college students might be a good idea, even if you had to hire more than one to meet schedules. I think I would be inherently a little suspicious of anyone who wanted to be a "career nanny," but then again I'm sure there are some great ones out there (just not your former one, apparently!)

One quick note - if you did provide the letter about her employment make sure you've paid all the requisite taxes. I'm sure you have (if I remember correctly your husband is an attorney?). If you haven't paid the taxes and she decides to go after you you could have some trouble.

I was a live-in nanny (au pair) many years ago and I would never have dared to ask for my personal expenses (toiletries, snacks, phone bill) to be reimbursed, that is what my weekly stipend was for... especially since you are providing room & board already and paying her a very high salary.
As an au pair, I provided about 45 hours of childcare for 18-months-old triplets and a 5-year-old girl... the cost per hour is about $7.5 per hour for great quality childcare and a dedicated, motivated, energetic nanny and member of the family... and for exposure to a second language and culture, which was really neat especially for the 5-year-old.

Let me know if I can help you Tsunami and good luck!

Glad things are working out better as your husband sounds like he's helping out more. We pay our nanny around $12.50 an hour and she does an awesome job with our 2 young children.