I agree efex101, that overall nursing is an easier gig. I was just trying to make the point that if you are willing to put in the work on the front end in med school/residency, practice can be more flexible. I just disagree that mothers who prioritize family should automatically default to nurse practitioner/PA. It just depends on that individual's circumstances at the time. I also agree that "lifestyle" specialties are not feasible for everyone... trust me, I couldn't land a dermatology residency in North Dakota.

Yes, I absolutely believe choosing a career primarily for money or prestige or any other primarily self serving reason is unethical if you have to lie to achieve that goal. If you want to be a surgeon, be a surgeon. In my personal experience the best doctors are the ones who are in it for the COMBINATION of right reasons, "best" being defined as having a lot of knowledge COMBINED with good bed side manner. I can spot a Doc in it for the wrong reasons right away because they usually either aren't very good, have crappy bedside manner, or both. And when you're making life and death decisions, it would help to be good at what you do. Duh!!!

The ONLY career that guarantees a Mom will ALWAYS be able to tuck her kids in at night is SAHM. Otherwise, I say check your ego "at the nearest door" and become a PA or Nurse. Just don't expect everyone on this board to see applying to multiply specialties the same nor expect that if programs find out about it, you'll suffer no negative consequences.

Geez, is this a generational thing? This board has become the land of "I want it all now and I want it MY way" which is extremely unrealistic in the field of medicine.

You do not know my situation or if I have a good bedside manner or not. Actually, I am extremely personable with patients and enjoy taking care of all types of problems in both children and adults, which is why I've had trouble choosing one specialty.

Also, if you think a single mother trying to match into a residency close to her family isn't a fair reason to apply to more than one specialty, that is your opinion. Honestly your opinions are of no help to me or my situation, so please just refrain from posting on this thread. thanks.

Clovermom,

I can see that you are in quite the bind in your decision making process and I commend you for trying to figure how best to do this. It's never easy being a mom in a demanding career.

There are a few things I would caution you on (as a 3rd year resident who just accepted a job offer for next year).

First, while 3 years doesn't seem that long, it can in fact be excrutiatingly long if you are in a bad situation. That situation can be not having family/childcare support or it can be being in the wrong field where you don't enjoy the work or it can be in an unfriendly program where you work hard and no one watches your back.

Second, careers vary widely. While many fields have their standard sort of set-ups, sometimes as Efex said, those options aren't available to you. You may have to relocate, for example, to find a part-time pedi job that offers benefits like health insurance.

Third, applying to more than one field can bite you in the butt. It works for some people, but I have seen other people end up without a match because programs caught wind of what they perceived to be "gaming" of the Match.

Talk to some EM residents, some FM residents, Pedi even, especially those in their 2nd and 3rd years. They will give you a more fair perspective about what their training is really like than other med students and even interns can. I remember as an intern I thought 2nd and 3rd years would be so much easier because there was less call.

In case you don't read my blog, I am a mother of 3 (older) kids and have a husband with his own high powered career. It can be done and done well, but it isn't easy. Exhaustion is a common issue for me. Burn-out haunted me about 1/2 of my 2nd year. That's just me being honest with you.

If you think you can be happy in a residency very near your family where you can have reliable loving childcare, go for it. EM fellowship from IM, FM, or Peds are all possible if in the future it is important to you. By then your situation may be completely different.

I wish you the best of luck! PM me any time.

TR

Oh, and there will always be naysayers and detractors. Their opinions don't matter. It's your life and your career and your child. Hang in there.

Let us all agree that this path is extremely difficult specially with little ones. You will have to make sacrifices and choices and unfortunately what may be a good choice NOW may be not so good later on. This profession is just chock full of ups/downs not matter which way you look at it. Like TexasRose mentioned you will have to make choices and at times may have to "move" away from family/support to find the right job or you may choose to stay near loved ones but the job is less than optimal. Choices choices choices. I am in the same boat with older kids and having an extremly difficult time picking where to relocate to...do I go down South with beter weather/pay/nice job but away from my son who is adamant about staying in the Tundra of MN? (he will be 18 but still) or do I stay up here in the Tundra to be close to him for now (because he may still eventually move after college) but less than desirable location? so you see we are all in this together

Clovermom, there is absolutely NO reason to take EVERYTHING I say as directed at you!! I'm sure you, like most Moms/Docs are great with patients so please stop taking everything so personally.

There's a ton of things to think about with career decisions and unfortunately not everything is always so positive and rosy. As for being single parent with a demanding career, I probably know more than most here having been in that situation myself (and got accepted MD/PhD to boot), so be mindful of whose advice you listen too. Career decisions make when your husband is banking are VERY different form those you make when you're a single parent, and yes I know a LOT about having a banking hubby too!

Opps, just read your last line of your post so please fee free to disregard EVERYTHING I've written.

Are you suggesting that someone who already has an MD go back to school to become a nurse or PA?

Also, you should probably be more clear where you are in your medical training when you are giving people advice on specialty choice or the match. Your signature makes it look like you are an MD/PhD Pathologist.

I know an MD trained pathologist who's working as a PA, that's Pathologist Assistant for the uninformed. Apparently she wasn't happy being a Pathologist and from what I hear, she's the best PA this particular institution has and earns ~120K. I've heard of a few similar stories with MD's becoming PA's, they're often superstars wherever they work. And I'd also guess that these ladies don't mind not being called "doctor" anymore.

As for my sig, I don't feel clarification is indicated. I shouldn't be a stretch to figure out what an arrow going from one career pointing to another means.