How bad is it if I show up to 1st day of medicine residency pregnant? Here's the context. I'm a 30 y/o MS4, ttc since beginning of the year, currently on clomid cycle #2. I want to keep trying clomid for the next few months. If I do get pregnant, I'll need time off really early in my intern year, and I'm sure my future co-interns and program director will hate me. As an MS4, my schedule is pretty light, so it's a lot easier to schedule for monthly doctor and U/S appointments. If I stop ttc and wait until I'm an intern, taking calls is going to mess up taking BBT, not to mention actually having time to ttc. I do have a supportive husband and family in town, and the programs I'm applying to seem to be pretty family-friendly. I know that intern year is probably one of the worst time to have a baby, but I'm having so much trouble ttc that I'm really worried about waiting another year.

You should continue on... ultimately it is not the end of the world to be off for a while. The job will still be there, your fertility window won't. It will probably be more difficult to have an infant during internship, but with supportive family nearby, it should be doable. Good luck!

That's a tough one. I'm an MS4, too, and personally I wouldn't...but I don't have any experience with infertility, so I don't feel I can comment on that. I do have kids, though, and if you're already worried that intern year might be incompatible with fertility treatments, there's a good chance that you'll find it incompatible with having a newborn. But resmom is right, too, you only have one window in time.

So....I don't know.

I would add that I was pregnant at the end of my intern year (last 3 months) and found it pretty easy to cope... but at that point I had already figured out the whole being-a-doctor thing and had well established resident friendships, which helped.

I think that you should go for it! If you're having trouble conceiving you may regret taking time off from trying. And the truth is, you'll figure it out. Having family nearby is invaluable (mine is close and helps out sooo much). It won't be easy to be pregnant or have a baby during intern year but it is certainly doable. My son was 4 1/2 months when we both started intern year and we survived. Sometimes I look back and wonder how but at the time you just get through it!

Good luck!

My first son was conceived with IVF; I was a medical student at the time. In general, I take a dim view of procreation during intern year, but I think this issue is the exception.

Unless you're dealing with pure MFI -- which it sounds like you're not, if you're taking Clomid -- I would never put fertility treatment on hold for medical training, not even intern year. Sure, a complicated (possibly multiple) pregnancy and/or a newborn during internship is far from ideal. But it beats not becoming a mother at all, which is a real risk, depending on what your particular situation is.

Having said that, if the Clomid cycles don't result in a pregnancy, keep in mind that IVF pregnancies are more likely to be a) multiple, b) complicated, c) preterm. So, chances are, your colleagues/PD may at some point feel a little miffed with your uterus. At which point, you can tell them to suck it.

You too? Did I know this and just forget?

We were dealing with normal fertility independently, but together just couldn't get it "together". IVF worked for us the first pop (thank GOD). I do have complications, but strangely, not from the IVF. And a singleton (again, thank GOD!).

I am also 35 and felt waiting much longer would be too much, esp for intern year. My school was willing to work with me, and have been so wonderful. I think we picked the right time to do it rather than waiting, but there really is no "good" time.

After intern year, we plan to just try naturally for another child and what happens, happens. In the meantime, we'll pursue adoption just in case. We're looking at 3-4 years down the road for another kid. But I feel much less anxious about the future of more children than I did when faced with the possibility of having none. I think I've even become a much more laid-back person because of it, too.

Oh yes, the BBT, cervical mucous, OPK strips, etc, etc. I know them well. I say go for it. Being a mom is a wonderful thing.

Dunno. I'm pretty open about it.

Also meant to say: stop checking your BBT. What a waste of time. Just have sex (at least) every other day. Stress relieving rather than anxiety provoking!

I actually found the BBT method very helpful. Of course, by the time your temp spikes you've already ovulated, so you really need to go by other indicators like cervical mucus, but it at least TELLS you when you've ovulated (actually, what we did were ovulation predictor kits that test for the LH surge, and then had sex daily between that positive and the BBT spike). Also, I knew I was pregnant before a test would have been positive because of tracking my BBT. Just my 2 cents...

On rereading the context though, measuring BBT is certainly NOT necessary so don't worry if it doesn't work with your schedule!

Sex every other day is not always a possibility, esp. for a med student on a stressful, demanding rotation

Thank you for all the input! I've heard an RE saying that BBT is the worst thing one can do because first thing in the morning a woman is reminded of her fertility issue. I'm sure that's true for some people, but charting somehow gives me a sense of control and keep me sane. I'm using OPK this cycle as well so I don't have to have sex every other day (tried this before, feel like it makes sex into a chore). The catch is my LH is kinda messed up to begin with, so it may not work. Before I got on clomid, my OB actually told me OPK is a waste of money in my case.

I'd say: if you think deep down you'd regret the potential setback to your career, then it might be worth stopping... but if (as seems more likely) you're just trying not to offend and make things difficult for others in terms of scheduling and looking like a slacker resident, I'd say there are a few things in life that trump that concern - like caring for a sick parent who needs you, or having a child while you're able to. I've spoken with residents who found out they were accidentally pregnant, due just before or after starting intern years at some of the most intense intern years in the country... and they survived with happy intact families and careers. I'd say: just do it.

This part (especially the bolded text) makes me feel better. I got a BFP two days after finishing my Pathology residency interviews, and will be due August 30th. We were not "trying" but not preventing, and I am really struggling with the idea of 1) having to call my new boss the Monday after the Match to explain that I will be 32 weeks pregnant on July 1, and 2) potentially losing the opportunity to bond with my fellow PGY-1s after mid-August (and thus being perceived as lazy or opportunistic). I guess the silver lining for me is that we don't do a traditional 'intern' year, and my top 5 programs are all large residencies with lots of ancillary staff support. Also: I will be available to cover for the women who get pregnant PGY-1 and have to have leave during PGY-2!

I wish I didn't have to wait until March to get the ball rolling on benefits (insurance, leave, etc.), choosing a new OB for delivery, working out a schedule for when I return, not to mention childcare and... where we are going to live. Thank goodness for supportive spouses and flexible family members!

I got on the waitlist for childcare at at least one place in my top pick cities when I interviewed places (I already had a child, so I was going to need care as of July 1). I'd say, as soon as you know, it's fair game to at least get on a couple of lists (yes, I paid some deposits - but childcare is SO critical I felt and still feel it was worth it). You won't be so far behind on all of this.

Hi Everyone,

My two cents. I had two children in medical school (one in the middle of second year and one in the middle of third year). I took a year mat leave for each. Now I'm pregnant with twins and due in March of my internship year. I planned all three pregnancies, and had no difficulties getting pregnant. I specifically requested (along with chocolates for the secretary), that my internship year be front loaded with my heavy call and that when I came back from another year of mat leave I have lighter rotations (e.g. electives, minimal in house call, or shift work), because call when pregnant is way easier than call when you're still breast feeding and trying to pump or coordinate a feeding visit. Having done this having a baby thing a few times here's what I have learned.

1) Yes it sucks to change "classes", you just make a few friends and start to have some supports and then you have to start over again. Grad was really hard and lonely, but I look at my kids and realize I wouldn't do it differently. I'll be changing residency groups and I'm actually really looking forward to joining my new group (since I helped recruit them), we have a small pathology program and it will be nice to have a couple other women in my year that I know and get along with. It also was good because I knew my seniors on rotations already because I had gone to med school with many of them, and I didn't have to "prove" myself. Knowing three years of fellow residents made things like consults a lot easier.

2) Interning and pregnant (especially with twins) was exhausting, you rapidly prioritize patient care and child care and everything else is dropped by the wayside - e.g. shopping, hair, housework, almost any non-family fun for that matter. Any staff that doesn't respect you for managing to do these two things well doesn't deserve your respect. They clearly haven't had a real life and don't have a clue about what is important. I found my greatest allies were the nursing staff who were far more familiar with the working mom situation than any of my colleagues, once they got to know a little about my personal life they cut me a lot of slack and the pages for tylenol at 2am weren't as frequent. You also get very good at prioritizing your reading around keeping patients alive or discharge planning.

3) Planning a pregnancy is some sort of oxymoron. I am really lucky, I get pregnant with a wink (or a blink in this case). Most of my friends who are residents or staff have had to "try", and stressing out about that on top of work can't help your fertility at all. Stop your birth control and drink a glass of wine, unwind and enjoy time with your partner (if you have one). Have sex when you want to (your body is trying to tell you that it is fertile) and enjoy it. After a year - get some medical advice (maybe you weren't having sex, as dumb as it sounds I know how little sex a medical couple can have, and it's a lot less once you have kids).

4) Mother hood and medicine are not easily compatible, something gives in both, but being a parent gives you an entire interpersonal skill set you didn't have before. You're going to have a lot of guilt about not doing either job perfect, learn to cope with it. Being a mom is hard enough without beating yourself up constantly, the same can be said about internship year (when you wake up at 2am and realize that you might have missed a PE).

I know I'm starting to ramble... gotta go write a SOP and yell at my kids and resist the urge to shovel snow because I'm trying to avoid bed rest...
Serenity Mommy