Her TED talk is awesome too.

That segment is great! Just watched it this morning (the segment). I need to ask myself what is worth me leaving my son for? Maybe that will help me choose...

Here is the link , for those of you who don't want to Google it. "Sit at the table"--that really convicts me; I'm the type to shrink back, and this really motivates me.

New Yorker article , not sure if you can read it all or if you need a subscription...

I like it when she says, "Lean in". Fires me up. Like, forget part-time private practice. Maybe I should aspire to be division chief ... or dean.



FWIW, this is not my impression of you.

While I don't necessarily agree with all of her points on inequalities, I do like the overall message of not leaving until you leave and not settling. I believe that women CAN find balance as a hardworking physician AND a mother. I've seen it and lived through it from the child aspect, and now I'm putting my feet in the water to try myself as a mother.

I never went into medicine wanting to be a CEO or Dean, though. I'm looking forward to a nice community practice in whatever I specialize in. But I am inspired by her to not settle for a specialty that I won't be the most happy in, or to defer promotion or advancement. I may miss out on some things with my son, but I don't want to give him an example of compromising happiness either.

I'm very fortunate to have a wonderful support system in my husband as well. I know with my support system my son won't be neglected.

Oh gosh, it's a vestige of my nursing days. "Yes, sir, okay sir. Whatever you say..."

I'm trying hard to get back my gumption, so I'm glad you think so!

Megboo, I think that is a good point. Not everyone wants the same thing out of life or their careers, and it's something I think that women are historically bad (ok, horrible) at--we don't support each other very well, especially when someone else's work/life choices differ from our own. (See: the sahm who thinks working moms are depriving their children or the working mom who things sahms are caving in to gender stereotypes.)

Haha, I don't know any nurses like that! Some real feisty ones out there. I come from a family full of nurses.

It is weird because I do feel like I have stepped back from leadership positions in my group. I am starting to work part time and would go even more part time if finances would allow it. Before baby, I was gearing up for whatever leadership position would suit me best. I was debating between president type of positin vs major clinical director type of position. Now I just want to spend more time with my son. And as I see my male collegues with children step into these positions without a second thought, I can't help feeling a little guilty like I let, what myself, women everywhere, or something/someone down. But the truth is, I am happier this way. Well, I am telling myself that once kids are in school I will go gung ho again. We'll see. May be I am happier working part time. May be when kids are in school, I would rather be rock climbing than politicking with people in some committee. We'll just have to see.

LOL that's my problem, I would start feisty, then give up too easily. (Then tried not to say "I told you so" when it turned out I was right the first time....)

clee, I think that there are "seasons" in your life, some where family needs more attention, others where the job gets more attention. I hate how we talk about our lives having to be "50/50" or "balanced". Life's just not like that.

One thing I've been trying to tell myself is that while my family, myself, my patients, and my teachers all have feelings, my medical school and my job do not. Whatever I "owe" is owed to other human beings, not institutions. Did that make sense? My point is don't feel guilty unless you've done someone wrong. And you haven't done anyone wrong . Quite the opposite, in fact.

Excellent point about seasons. Also, our priorities change when the "seasons" change. Before Viktor, I was so career-oriented it wasn't even funny. I still am, but I probably won't be as aggressive until he's older. I just look at that little face and melt! But it's not enough to keep me from going back to "work" - I really, really need that for my sanity.

But then again, maybe something will fall in my lap someday too good to pass up! Nothing is ever set in stone. As we say in our family - you want to make God laugh, make plans.