9 years 1 day ago #76832 by lola1984
So this is my story. I'm posting it here, because I have no one else to talk to, and I just need to get it out. I'm a 4th year med student, in the middle of interviews, 8-weeks pregnant, studying for boards, trying to keep up on rotations. And oh yeah, my husband is going to jail tomorrow for drunk driving. It was his second offense in 10 years, so he could have been charged with a felony, but instead agreed to plea guilty to a misdemeanor and serve 60 days in jail. The only good thing coming from this is that he is finally recognizing that he has a drinking problem, and has been going to AA meetings, and hasn't had a drink in almost three months. But I don't know what I'm going to do without him. He keeps me sane. And we've been through a lot of crap, especially these past few months, but it has been so nice to not have to worry about his drinking. But now he's gone, and going to jail, and I'm scared and worried, and stressed, and I obviously can't tell anyone about it because they'll think I'm crazy for being with him. Everyone complains about how hard med school is and how stressed they are, and all I think is that I WISH med school was the biggest stress in my life. I just wish I had someone that i could talk to about this. It's so hard. I'm going to miss him so much, and I'm going to be so lonely. And I'm supposed to be studying for boards too. How the heck am I supposed to focus on that now?! Oh, and eating healthy and exercising so I don't gain too much weight during pregnancy too.

I'm so overwhelmed...

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9 years 1 day ago #76840 by Melbelle
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. It's a pretty unique situation, so I can't say I've been there... but we're a supportive group here. :)

It's sad that you can't talk to your family about it, but I totally understand that. I realized recently that I am not as concerned about what my husband actually does as I am that my family might think I married a jerk. I don't know why that bothers me, but it does.

I think med school wouldn't really be that hard if we could just sit and study all the time. Of course those who can probably don't know what they have, but such is life.

So... as long as you're sad and consulting with strangers, I'll try to add some optimism (which is what I'd do now if you were a friend on my couch). At least he won't be a felon! Felony makes finding jobs and renting apartments and traveling outside the country very difficult. Also, he'll be back while you're still in fairly early pregnancy. Also, you can appreciate him more when he's back. In the meantime, you can set yourself an amazing schedule or something. With the baby coming, it might be the last time you can own your time. I'm not a parent - just a rumor I've heard about kids. ;)

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