× Family & Parenting

IVF and Mommy-ing

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2 years 1 month ago #96662 by LBTS
A quick background-

I'm currently a MS2, repeating part of the year due to a failing pre-clinical grade. Will be taking step 1 in May for the first time. My husband and I are recently married and due to a number of issues, we are limited to IVF. The closest clinic that can handle the complexities of our case is aproximately 2 hours away from where we live and where I attend medical school.

We will be doing an IVF cycle this spring with the goal of freezing all of the embryos we get. We are hoping this will make future transfers easier and less of an issue for taking time off. It could, of course, all go poorly and end with no frosties, but we're praying for the best.

We're trying to think out the timing of doing an actual transfer and have been mostly unsuccessful. I would like to just do a fresh transfer, delivering mid third year, so that I could have all of M4 to spend more time with baby, but hubby still feels that's a little too soon. He is proposing a PGY2 baby, with him then being a stay at home dad. While logistically his plan sounds better, I'm feeling cheated on the opportunity to breastfeed and have a month or two off with our little one.

I know, without doubt, that I want to pursue ObGyn, hopefully with a fellowship in REI, but know the odds are not in my favor. We are hoping to stay close to the area where our clinic is, so we will have family support as well.

Any of you ladies been in a similar spot? Do you have advice to share?

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2 years 1 month ago #96665 by sahmd
I have not been in that position, but I also think it is a good idea to wait before transferring the embryos. My thinking is that if you have had academic difficulties already, you should probably avoid anything else that could worsen your chances of matching. This is especially true if you are looking at a very limited number of programs (through a desire to stay in a certain area) (and BTW please don't do that -- apply to other programs as well). The middle of third year is not really a good time for anybody to have a baby, because the hours are long, the schedule of rotations can be rigid, and you are trying to make the best impression on people who will be writing your letters of recommendation. Hopefully in PGY2 you can arrange things so that you can have a light rotation or two after your maternity leave.

I also think it is awesome that your husband is willing to be a SAHD. You should totally take him up on his offer of help and support during that busy time in your career.

Good luck with everything!

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