I’m currently pregnant due mid-Aug 2018 with our first. My husband will be a PGY-2 in FM at the due date... No family close and I doubt I’ll get more than a few weeks off for Mat leave. Any suggestions on how and when to tell my future res program, and for What to do for child care with such a young infant? Our moms would definitely come live with us if need-be, but would like to consider other options. Any input is greatly appreciated!!!
It is great that your moms would come and help. Take them up on it! You and your husband will both be super busy, even before you consider the additional time and energy required by a newborn. I don't know much about newborn childcare options, but it seems to me the main issues are 1) cost, 2) illnesses from being around other children in a shared childcare situation, and 3) trust that the caregiver will do as good a job as your moms would.
As for when to tell your future residency program, the most obvious thing would be to wait until after the match. Even though it would be illegal to discriminate against you because of this, I think it is still a real possibility. Aside from that, I think most people wait until after the first trimester is over to tell employers (or anybody else) because of the higher risk of miscarriage during the first trimester. They will still have 6 months to get everything arranged to account for your maternity leave, so there is no rush. I have no idea what exactly I would say to the director. I think you would have to tread a fine line between acknowledging that there will be some scheduling issues, while also portraying yourself as competent and committed to EM and to the program.