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Long distance during residency

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5 years 9 months ago #92586 by Caroline82
My husband and I just found out yesterday that we matched in our respective fields (orthopedic surgery and dermatology) but in very different locations (Los angeles and Miami). We were in the couples match but ranked combinations with us in different places because we were very worried about not matching. I am happy to have matched in such a competitive field but pretty devastated we will be so far apart. We are both relatively young (mid 20's), don't have any children yet (had originally hoped to try in residency) and have been married around 4 years. He has been very supportive of my career and we want to try to make things work no matter what. Has anyone here been in a similar situation or have any advice? Thanks in advance!

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5 years 9 months ago #92587 by southernmd
I'm confused - your other posts say you have two kids? Talking about psychiatry and pathology lifestyle? Are you two people using one account?

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5 years 9 months ago #92588 by sahmd
Assuming that the poster is not the one who wrote the previous posts(hmmm)...congratulations! I haven't been in that situation, but if I were you, I would go ahead and do my derm residency and be thankful that I do not have any children yet. You are both adults and there are lots of ways to make a long-distance relationship work. I'm sure there will be ways to live closer together in the future.

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5 years 9 months ago #92592 by Popcorn
First of all, congrats on matching such an exceptionally tough-to-get-into residency!

There are plenty of flights between the two, and you wouldn't be seeing much of each other at least the first year anyway. Plan your vacations together, and it will make the time together that much sweeter. (I did the distance thing for 4 years once, and it made our communication so much stronger. Yeah, it sucked, but it's only for a few years, and you will get through it.)

If you find you can't stand it after a year or two, see if he can transfer to a Florida program. (You have the tougher match, I think he should come to you.)

Residency feels like forever, but it's really a finite amount of time. Take a deep breath, start looking for apartments, and be excited about it!

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