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your opinion on writing about kids in ps

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11 years 6 months ago #839 by twinkle
so, i recently found out that i didn't get into my first choice school (i do, however, have an acceptance elsewhere). my boyfriend suggested that it was because i mentioned that i had kids in my personal statement and also talked about it in my interviews. (i was a teen mom and i felt that this was a very integral part of how i became who i am, it solidified my character and shaped my desires to be a doctor). he feels that the schools would have taken me if i had cut that part out since it would have made me look like a liability.

obviously, this made me quite upset, but i'm trying to be rational about it. i think that it would not be possible for me to portray myself in a way that didn't touch upon that greatly, my kids are my life in a way. additionally, i'm not sure i could have explained my desire to be a physician without talking about the challenges i've had with my kids. i would have sounded like every other robot who did research..worked at a free clinic..blahblahblah. but it still bugs me, could i have caused my own downfall?

opinions would be appreciated. thanks.

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11 years 6 months ago #840 by twinmom
I doubt it - I mentioned my kids in my personal statement (our roller coaster with TTTS and my adventures in PubMed while on bed rest and with newborn preemies). But.... all of the "good" schools I got into are known for being non-traditional friendly, and there was even another mom at my top-25 school interview. By the way, I talked about my kids in every interview.

Look at it this way - you really, truly do *not* want to spend your medical school years at some place that's going to be hostile to you as a mom. It really helps to know that not only am I welcome, but one of our deans went to medical school in her 30's with 3 little kids!

I'm so pleased that you've gotten an acceptance - you'll do well, and this should be a very exciting time for you! The school that accepted you - you're not just a number to them. Seriously, the numbers are what get you the interviews, but then they see if they like you at the interviews. So, yes, they like you. They believe you will succeed in their program. Please try not to stew over this, since there will be plenty of things to stew over as you go. (Just being honest. I don't think there's a single person here who's been to med school who's never been mad about something that happened at school.)

Again, congratulations on your acceptance. Enjoy the time and get your house as clean and organized as you can! :)

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11 years 6 months ago #841 by Baby Einstein
I talked about my son too, in my PS and in my interview (I only applied to one school). I agree with what twinmom said: it probably didn't make a difference, but if it did, then that school would not have been a good fit for you. Congrats on your acceptance!

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11 years 6 months ago #842 by TexasRose
I also agree with twinmom and Baby E. I doubt talking about your kid had much to do with your acceptance and if it did it was for a good reason (as in, they aren't willing to support parents.) I talked about my family in my PS and all my interviews and got accepted to my top schools, so I don't think it hurt me at all.

Don't worry about it. You're going to medical school and you're going to a school that appreciates and values you as an applicant. That's what matters most! :D

"All you have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to you."

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11 years 6 months ago #843 by LauraMD
I also mentioned my son in my PS (gosh.. seems like a million years ago....) Now, granted, I wanted to go to my state school, not Harvard or Stanford. Still, I got accepted right away.

I also agree with twinmom that you don't want to spend med school someplace hostile to someone with kids. So, if that is why you were rejected, it is a blessing in disguise.

Still, I am really sorry you are disappointed. It sucks that you didn't get in where you most want to go. BUT congrats on getting accepted elsewhere--and welcome to the jungle! ;)

And when they carve my stone, all they need to write on it is, "Once lived a man who got all he ever wanted..." --Ty Herndon

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11 years 6 months ago #844 by twinkle
thanks, ladies! you made me feel a lot better. i agree that any school that would reject me based on the fact that i have kids is definitely not for me. i found it quite upsetting that my own bf would suggest that i should have "played the game" by hiding it like that. i am aware that many schools are traditional, old white men's worlds (i hope that is not offensive, just seems like that is how it is) but i've always been one to challenge traditional ideas. thanks for the added confidence!

i'm really looking forward to starting school. the place i've been accepted to has several student parents in leadership positions. the school seems really supportive and i'm so excited! :)

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