I just wanted to write a thank you for the advice and guidance offered by you ladies. I am happy to report that my family is in a really good place right now, and a significant part of it has to do with the encouragement and recommendations offered through this forum. My husband and I are almost done with our residencies (in 3/3 yr for my husband, 3/4 yr for me) and are surviving with a stable marriage and a healthy and happy 1.5 yr old. It is often not easy balancing motherhood with medicine, but I have been able to find a good balance this year that gives me confidence for the future. Some of the feedback that I have received through this forum that has helped tremendously is:
(1) You need a solid support system, which can come in many different packages. For us at this moment it is a daycare and nanny combo, but there is not just one way that works. The feedback on au pairs, daycare, nannies, babysitters, family childcare, and spouse child care has been very helpful in tailoring our child care to our specific situation and needs.
(2) There isn't always a "perfect" time to become a mom in medicine, and that is ok. There may be better times than others to raise a family, but there are moms in all levels of training and practice. That is pretty awesome.
(3) We are not alone. My experience through this forum has encouraged me to seek out relationships with other physician moms. These friendships have been invaluable during my time in residency, from providing each other support and guidance to commiserating in the challenges that can come from being mommy doctors.