I am currently in the middle of surgical residency and am going through the match again. I told my program director back in November about my decision, and said I would finish the year unless they could find someone to replace me sooner (my current year of training is not a prerequisite for what I am applying in).
They hired someone to start in July. Meanwhile, I have been sinking into a pretty bad depression. There were a couple weeks where I was actually a risk to myself. I clearly am not doing my job to the level I should and my emotions have been really hard to manage. I've started to try to get help (should have done sooner) but I just wish I could resign to work on myself and get to a better place prior to starting over in a new training program. Obviously this would put my co residents in a huge bind and I would feel terrible about that. I can't figure out at what point to put myself (my mental health, energy, time to prepare for new field) ahead of my current program. Would appreciate outside perspective.