Thanks so much for your responses. I can't ever know or imagine what my lifestyle will be like once I'm in, but I do know the type of commitment my husband is ready to provide for our family. With so many people saying, it's not worth it: compensation, debt, time away from family, etc... I still can't help but acknowledge the volumes of people who admit "I've always had this dream," or "a feeling of what if" - and this is coming from people who have tried to walk away from the field by choosing something less demanding (based on time-commitment) like nursing, PA, pharm, counseling, social work, etc.
Is being a doctor truly a "calling"? Teachers have a bad rep as far as I'm concerned in that we are not respected because people think anyone can be a teacher. I teach high school biology in the inner city of a rough urban neighborhood. I believe I was called to be here, and I have been given a gift as an excellent educator. I train other teachers, give presentation to grad students in education, and serve as head of several key committees at school... but I do believe my time is up. I've served the community, and I feel like it's time to live for me.
Do other doctors feel "obligated," and like it is truly a calling - or is that a bunch of crap once you're knee deep in paperwork? I'm not naive in thinking that I will love all parts of practicing medicine; I've had other jobs before to know that I don't love all parts at all times (especially teaching) - but what keeps you doctors hanging in there at the end of the day? I feel like I'm settling by being a teacher. As I stated before, I am comfortable: decent lifestyle, okay salary, vacations with my husband and son...I'm not sure I can give all of that up just yet.
For those of you who were indecisive about starting medical school, residency, etc. and balancing a family: WHAT 'A-HA' MOMENT TURNED IT AROUND FOR YOU? WHAT EXPERIENCE (shadowing, talking to a mentor, etc.) GAVE YOU THE CONFIDENCE TO SAY, "I CAN DO THIS"?
Thanks again. I think I just need a mentor.. someone to talk to - who will keep it 100% real. I've spoken to so many female physicians who are either bitter and angry about their decisions, or too clueless to recognize that they were on the verge of losing it! lol. Feel free to PM me, or reply to the thread.. I'm sure I'm not the only one out there looking for an answer