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Lost and Overwhelmed

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10 years 3 months ago #68492 by rootsmomx4
Hi irish,
I renewed my liscense without trouble just using my home address. I haven't had to renew my DEA yet... I guess I will use my home address at the time if they will let me. I saw another post on here that said she did. I will try.

Good luck to you. I constantly struggle with my decision. I get calls from locum companies asking me if I would like a position. I am tempted. Part of me is scared to go back... What if I forget everything. I have been keeping up on my CME etc..

Then I think that I am only considering returning because that is what others expect me to do. I am quite happy being at home. It certainly isn't as stressful. Sometimes I feel guilty that I am not stressed out. Isn't that crazy. I was so use to being on edge all the time that I feel guilty if I am not. Stupid right?

I trust that if the right position comes along and things are right for my family I will no.

Trust your instincts.

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10 years 3 months ago #68493 by curious
I am 6 weeks away from what will hopefully be the opening day of my practice. I'm not exaggerating when I say that my stomach has been tied up in knots for the past several months. Sometimes I think that I am incredibly stupid for the chance I'm taking. Then, I think that something inside of me has to do this. I won't lie, I'm terrified of failure. The financial ramifications are huge, and I have a family to be responsible for. What if I don't have any patients? What if I have to close my doors in a year? Where will I come up with the money to pay my debts? I don't want to move again. I can't.

I need to find creative ways to reach the patients. I know that I can get patients by word of mouth, I just need to get the first ones in. Advertising is so expensive. My husband has been so supportive. I thought about many alternatives. I've thought about a residency in something else, but I wouldn't even know where to begin. I've thought about leaving medicine altogether, but that's not simple either. I'm not very good at selling myself. Never was a good salesperson.

Sometimes all we can do is make the best decision we can at that time. Please think good thoughts out there. I need all the divine intervention I can get.

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10 years 3 months ago #68494 by curious
I am 6 weeks away from what will hopefully be the opening day of my practice. I'm not exaggerating when I say that my stomach has been tied up in knots for the past several months. Sometimes I think that I am incredibly stupid for the chance I'm taking. Then, I think that something inside of me has to do this. I won't lie, I'm terrified of failure. The financial ramifications are huge, and I have a family to be responsible for. What if I don't have any patients? What if I have to close my doors in a year? Where will I come up with the money to pay my debts? I don't want to move again. I can't.

I need to find creative ways to reach the patients. I know that I can get patients by word of mouth, I just need to get the first ones in. Advertising is so expensive. My husband has been so supportive. I thought about many alternatives. I've thought about a residency in something else, but I wouldn't even know where to begin. I've thought about leaving medicine altogether, but that's not simple either. I'm not very good at selling myself. Never was a good salesperson.

Sometimes all we can do is make the best decision we can at that time. Please think good thoughts out there. I need all the divine intervention I can get.

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10 years 3 months ago #68495 by IrishMD
Wow- i feel for you--certainly stressful...do you have any friends in IM or FP that could refer to you that wanted to stop doing their own pap's, routine care, etc...maybe find someone in area. as an IM i referred to gyn all the time for things because i was so swamped with all the other issues and helped a new doc out with referrals after talking to her on the phone... just a thought
do you feel that your husband and family pressured you to go back to work? my husband tries to be ok with me staying home but sees it as so easy for me to get another clinical job for more income and doesn't understand me having a medical degree and not working. when i was so unhappy he too wanted me to quit my former job, but he just thinks there is a better situation out there. he thinks i could just find a parttime job and it would be so much easier than when I was full time. i try to explain parttime jobs in IM hard to come by and still lots of work. i am trying to look into non clinical things and he just doesn't think that will go anywhere. since he isn't happy with our situation i find it hard too. it's like i can't win working or not working...

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10 years 3 months ago #68496 by curious
Irish, it's so hard to find a situations that will work for us. My husband is very supportive. I have been terribly unhappy with my work situations since leaving residency. Sometimes you can't always make it work the way you want, especially when you work for other people. Ob is another hard area where it's really hard to be part-time. The malpractice is full-time, the call is full-time. The stress is full-time. My husband is similar in that he thinks I just need to find the right job. It's just not that easy. There are financial pressures because I have always been the primary earner in the family.

I was sitting here today thinking about how scared I am. The money involved. There's no one who truly understands. The other gyns in my town have been very helpful, but they have been here for a long time and already have a following. I'm starting from scratch really, and there are alot of us here. I've thought of non-clinical things as well, but have not come up with anything. Plus, I do like women's health. Just not ob. All I really want is to make a reasonable living, practice some medicine, and be a mother to my children. There's absolutely alot of pressure because no one really understands what we go through.

There are times when I feel like this part of my life has been one massive mistake, and there's no way to come back from it. So, I keep trying to make things work somehow "in the system". Financially, I have to do something, even though my husband works, he doesnt' make that much, and the student loan debt is ridiculous.

I'm scared and stressed and there's a part of me that thinks this can't possibly work out. But....what other options do I have?

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10 years 2 months ago #68497 by curious
Things are moving along. My first newspaper ad will come out in a few days. I've ordered business cards, I have a logo, and I am putting together a physician letter to send to the PCPs in town. I'm also putting together a postcard to do a mass mailing. New floors have been put down in the office space (which is tiny), and it has been freshly painted. I've ordered exam tables and waiting room furniture. I've contracted with an EMR/PM system and am designing a website. I've hired an MA, who fortunately has worked in an ob/gyn office before. I was going to hire a receptionist as well, but in the beginning, there won't be that many patients and I just don't want to pay people to sit around. I need to streamline my costs as much as possible.

I still have to order medical supplies, a sign for my door, and the major capital equipment like urodynamics machine, colposcope , computers, etc. Fortunately, my husband is going to be my IT guy. He's a little geeky in that respect, which comes in handy!

Despite having to do this, I still have to do the shopping, the cooking, get the kids where they need to be, schedule doctor's appointments, clean, etc, etc, etc.

Oh...and, I just find out that I have not one, but 3 ulcers. and I've lost 10 pounds. That's not good new for me, because I'm underweight.

So much to do....so little time.

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