× Women in Medicine Blogs & Diaries

My journey to be...anything...DO hopefully?

13 years 10 months ago #70207 by dnw826
Oh my God! I just got admitted to UNC-Chapel Hill! I have always wanted to go there. We were so set on Chapel Hill (to move) for awhile, so I applied, but my dh only has gotten a job interview for Greenville. ECU is really nice, too, and I will be astonished if I get into both. What do I do? Try and search for a job again for dh in Chapel Hill? It's pricier to live there, and the crime rate is substantial for what I am used to. But this has been my dream! I am going to be sick! I was hoping that I wouldn't be admitted so that I wouldn't have to make this choice if it came down to it and we can't move there.

This admission really gives me hope, but I am just stunned right now! Dh is flying out for a job interview this week, even for this company. And if they offer him a decent job, then we will need to take it. Help!

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13 years 8 months ago #70208 by dnw826
So we are all moved in now. Finally! We still need some furniture, and I am going to go on an IKEA shopping spree for bookshelves, and buy a Sony VAIO tonight. Anyone have any VAIO tips/IKEA tips? Anyone have any reviews of World Market's awesome tables? I think that we are going to get the Sourav table and benches. Chairs are EXPENSIVE! Holy cow! I am used to the crap walmart $25 for the table and chair set. I have searched high and low for chairs that are decent and would half way match. I also need tons of bookshelves.

I need a job. We are so poor. Unfortunately, all of our money has to go to buying furniture, since we quite literally have none. We also need a bed, but that might have to wait. They paid dh all of the rest of his salary from his old job (he had it spaced out for pay) and almost 1/4 was taken for taxes. :censored:

I applied to the hospital for a job, and need to get back ahold of them. They haven't gotten ahold of me yet. I am actually on the phone now trying to call them. But they don't answer their phones! I have been calling constantly for 3 days!

I thankfully found a preschool for dd#2 and ds. It is so cheap, so now I may be able to pay for dd#1 to go to private school, since the schools here are terrible. We ran around all day today filling out papers. And we also got a washer and dryer and couch, finally!

So I think that I am giving up. I am so sick of being poor. We will have -$260 for groceries each month without me working since dh makes a higher salary, but brings home less after taxes and insurance. We can't afford for me to keep going to school forever. And with my school schedule, weekends are the only time that I will get to see my dd#1 once she's in Kindergarten between my day and night classes, my volunteering, and my needing to get a job.

I have decided to go the PA route for now. I can go back and finish taking my pre-reqs for med school at a later date when we are more financially stable, if I want to at the time. I need to finish my Bachelor's. Now I need to decide whether to do Classics or Anthropology. I like both, but I think Classics will take longer. But Classics looks more prestigious and will get me more jobs if I decide to quit school entirely once I graduate with my B.A. What's a girl to do????

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13 years 8 months ago #70209 by dnw826
So the synagogue in town just called. This is something that I have wanted to join since I was little. I am having a bit of a religous breakdown right now, though. I have always been a cynic to the highest degree. But there were also certain things that I always believed strongly in. Certain truths, if you will. And I have been doing a lot of reading about history (more than usual) and religous history in particular. I am going to bed at night wounded. These beliefs I have had are shot down. I am so disgusted by the lies that I have been taught and what I was taught was a good thing really stemming from something sickening and horrific.

I am almost in tears all the time by what I have read. And the proof is there-it is fact. I don't know what to do. I have lost all faith. I feel like my spirit is broken. I have never been a horribly religious person. I went through periods of devout catholicism, being baptist, methodist, etc. And mostly Jewish my whole life. But mostly I have been agnostic. But I always had hopes that something would come along and give me more faith. And my search has taken me into the opposite direction.

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