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Physican's wife seeking divorce before pursuing medical school

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7 months 1 week ago #141338 by Jessica
This question is mainly for medical students, residents, and physicians. I am 32 and married to a Hospitalist. I will spare you he details but I've come to terms with the fact that Ive been in an abusive marriage. We got married when my husband was 32. I was his 3rd wife. First wife lasted 1 month, second wife 11 months. We've been married now 4 years. I stayed entirely too long due to fear. I do not come from money at all and I stupidly decided to be a housewife. He was arrested for domestic violence in 2016 and I foolishly decided to work on the marriage with him when he made promises. Last year I got pregnant and we currently share a son. He has pretty much physically and emotionally abandoned me while providing the bare necessities I need to survive. He spends a total of 1 hour at home seeing his son, the rest of his time is at work or pursuing his hobbies.

Before I met him, my desire was to be a physician. That desire has ONLY intensified knowing that people like him are practicing medicine on vulnerable populations.

Anyway, my goal is to move towards divorce and have it finalized before the end of the year. My question is, were there any divorced mothers in medical school? Do you think its wise for me to pursue medical school with a 4 month old? What is the best advice you could give me?

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6 months 4 weeks ago #141340 by TastyShred
We have the same situation jessica. now im waiting for some response to help us in this issue

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6 months 3 weeks ago #141341 by sahmd
Hi Jessica, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this situation :(

It is possible to be a divorced mother in medical school. It is also possible to have a young child in medical school. However, the likelihood of success seems to be related to the amount of family support you have. Your husband does not seem like he would be very supportive, to say the least. More importantly, I think domestic violence is a very tricky situation, and it is the last thing you want to be dealing with during medical school and residency.

My advice is to seek safety for yourself and your child. That has to be your number one priority. Read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin deBecker first because it is not as simple as just getting a divorce. (((hugs)))

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